Divorce can be Difficult During the Holidays
Thanksgiving was only the start of a festive holiday season that often involves weeks of parties, shopping, and celebrations with friends and family. These holiday events can sometimes last beyond New Year’s Day, and this season can seem daunting and endless if it coincides with any emotional strife in your life. For this reason, individuals who are going through a divorce often struggle through the holiday season. These struggles are generally only magnified if you have any children, as you will likely strive to ensure that they enjoy their holidays while their family is splitting apart. Fortunately, there are a number of ways you can try to alleviate the stress of divorce on your children during this festive time.
Be Flexible About Dates
As author Mary Ellen Chase famously said, Christmas “is not a date. It’s a state of mind.” Scheduling celebrations can be significantly more complicated if your children are already sharing time between two divorcing parents. Shuttling children to several homes on one day for different gatherings can be extremely stressful and draining for already stressed kids. If necessary, one parent may want to consider holding a particular celebration a few days later, even if it is not on the date of the holiday.
Do Not Compete
Parents often feel guilty for putting their children through the divorce and they may try to make the children feel better by giving them particularly extravagant gifts. Additionally, it may be tempting for one spouse to try to secure the approval of children by overindulging them with presents, especially if they know the other parent cannot afford to do the same. This type of competition sends the wrong message to children and may cause them to feel confused about what to feel. Consider making an agreement with your spouse to stick to specific gift lists or price limits to keep gift giving within reasonable limits.
Take Care of Yourself
It is always difficult to take quality care of your children if you are not taking care of yourself. Find support in family and friends, ask for help when you need it, and try not to feel the pressure of trying to have the “perfect” holiday season. Remind yourself that the holidays will be inherently different after divorce and try to make new traditions rather than constantly grieving the loss of old ones. Many children will naturally follow your example of approaching the holidays with a positive attitude and working together to enjoy this time of year, and this can help you enjoy yourself, as well.
Contact an Experienced Divorce Attorney for Help Today
If you are facing divorce, it is important to have an experienced and committed family law attorney handling your case. At All Family Law Group in Tampa Bay, we understand how difficult divorce can be, especially during the holidays, and we strive to make everything related to your case go as smoothly as possible. Please do not hesitate to call us at 813-816-2232 for a consultation at no charge.
By Lynette Silon-Laguna Google+